Sunday, November 04, 2007

I've moved

My new writing home is here. Come on over and check it out!

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Asstastic


Fall aftermath
Originally uploaded by Dani H.
That's how I described my Sunday two weeks ago to my sister.

Our house is very asscentric. Mojo likes to show off his, Rusty gets his spanked when he's bad, Rusty is obsessed with Mojo's, I am currently obsessed with making normal poop come out of Neville's (he's got a diarrhea problem at the moment), Sugar is always looking to kick some, and I asked two friends at work to keep an eye on mine for a few days.

What?

I had a little mishap a couple weeks ago. I was sitting on a stepstool scooping Mojo & Sugar's litter box, trying to pry a large clump free (what happened is karma for my not having scooped in a few days). I managed to topple myself backwards off the stool, landing on Rusty's ceramic food dish, which already had a piece broken out of it.

I broke another piece off when I landed on it, which not only hurt but made me mad (imagine that). Obscenities were yelled, and I went back to scooping.

Dave came out to see what happened, so I told him what an idiot I was. He walked around behind me and said, "Uh, you're bleeding!" I felt the spot, and sure enough, blood -- and two little holes in my shorts -- were found.

Scooping forgotten I went into the bathroom to check my wound and discovered that it looked like a vampire had latched onto my inner left ass cheek. Nice. (Side note: Do you know how hard it is to check something like that in a mirror? I can tell you: very.)

So I washed my wound (also not easy) and tried to stop the bleeding. Tried being the operative word. I didn't think it would ever stop! At one point I thought it had stopped, so I rinsed out the washcloth really good, checked the injury, and found blood running down my leg. Also nice.

I started to get worried, and declared that "No way in hell am I getting stitches in my ass today." Dave came in after the bleeding had slowed down and said it didn't look like it needed stitches anyway.

I eventually finished the scooping (very carefully) and then it was time to shower for work. Hot water on cuts: Ouch. Body wash on cuts: Ouch. Shampoo on cuts: Ouch.

So, that's why I had two friends watching my ass. I just wanted a little heads up if the bleeding started again.

Thursday, August 30, 2007

The new addition


Closeup lap cat
Originally uploaded by Dani H.
Last Friday that cute little kitten there was hanging around outside work. He was all scrawny and wet, and I said if he was still around when I went home he was going to have to go with me. Well, my friend Jason went looking for the kitten, and after sitting back behind the bushes found the kitten and brought him inside.

So now the kitten is living in our bathroom. He's got some infections, ear mites and worms, but as soon as he's all better he'll be allowed out with everyone else.

It was Dave's turn to name the pet, and out of all the suggestions, including several storm-related ones, he chose Neville (from Harry Potter).

Neville is just the sweetest little thing! He is constantly purring, and loves to sit or lay in your lap and get his belly scratched. He also likes to snuggle up under your chin or sit on your shoulder. He's like a little rag doll -- pick him up, move him around on your lap, put him over your shoulder, hold him like a baby, he doesn't care.

He hates getting his medicine though, but he never tries to get away, and when it's all over with he just curls back up in my lap and starts purring again.

The "fun" really begins, though, when the other animals meet him ...

Friday, August 24, 2007

It's true

You do find out who your friends are in times of possible catastrophe. And it's pretty interesting.

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

We're OK

We personally are not flooded, but the city and county sure are. The flood has reached "historic proportions," and apparently the governor is in town. Thank god we stayed away from the flood zone when we bought the house.

Saturday, April 21, 2007

Heavy breathing


More duffel cat
Originally uploaded by Dani H..
Do you see the sweet little Baby Cat to the right? That little brat gave us a scare earlier tonight, as she's been known to do.

While Dave & I were eating dinner, there was a ruckus in the office (Cause: Fat Mojo attack). We went in and broke it up, shooed everyone out.

So later, I'm in the office surfing the Net, and I hear something scratching at the window, akin to nails on a chalkboard. I'm thinking the possum is back and wants in. I pull the curtain aside just as Sugar Puddin' leaps against the window again FROM THE OUTSIDE. As in trying to GET BACK INSIDE.

I calmly went to the living room and told Dave that she was out there - how the fuck did she get out there? - but not to come out with me while I tried to get her because she'd really freak out if we both were trying to get her.

Well, I saw her at the end of the house and she mewed at me, but would not come to me. I tried to find her, but it was way too dark, so I had Dave get me a flashlight. That's when he told me that the cats had knocked the screen out of the window - ah, that's how.

Well, I found her huddled by the backyard fence, and she yowled at me, but I knew she wouldn't come to me, so I wasn't sure what I was going to do. Then I saw Dave in the office window, which he opened. I told him to stand back 'cause she'd be flying in any second, and sure enough she did.

I don't know if she fell out, or just thought she'd go on a little adventure, and I guess it doesn't really matter but DAMN.

Some of her other panic-inducing moments include her getting away when I tried to take her outside on a leash when I lived on MAIN STREET in Bowling Green because I am stupid, her dashing outside to chase a cat when I tried to throw water on it, and her hiding in a suitcase on moving day making us think she'd gotten out while our mattress was being taken to the van. I knew from the first two incidents that no way would I get close to her tonight since I almost had to tackle her those times to get hold of her.

But, everyone is safe and sound, and all screenless windows are closed for the night.

Friday, April 13, 2007

Biggest. Purchase. Ever.


The house
Originally uploaded by Dani H..
We're homeowners. HomeOWNERS. Have been for about a month and a half. And you know what? It doesn't really feel any different.

Maybe it's because we aren't totally done with the rental (lease is up at the end of the month; couldn't get out of it). Maybe it's because there are still boxes all over the place (I really should have taken a week off to move and get settled in). Maybe it's because - well, honestly, I don't know why. We've already have a few things happen that really should have made it sink in.

What you can't see from the photos is how we got three hot showers before the water heater crapped out (I got the fourth shower).

You can't see how we seem to have some sort of plumbing issue that I noticed today gets worse after I do a load of laundry.

You can't see the screwy wiring for the dryer that causes it to only work on the high setting, and it usually needs run at least twice and sometimes three times. Also, it works better if you leave the garage light on.

You will see the traps in the back yard for the possum, but you won't see the two dead possums Dave had to fish out from under the deck that were attracting a third possum, hence the need for the traps.

But, the water heater was covered by our home warranty so we got a brand new one for WAY less than what it would have been. We have a plumber coming on Monday. The wiring will be taken care of eventually.

And the traps are gone now. No possum was caught, but the same squirrel was caught twice in the same trap. And after seeing it up close and personal I have to say they are crazy little animals.

The cats adjusted relatively quickly, and Rusty needed no time at all, of course. And he loves loves loves his back yard. I really can't wait for it to warm up and not be rainy so we can just hang out outside and not get cold (me) and muddy (Rusty).

I'm off to check on the dryer, so go look at the floors that Dave & my dad put down, and be sure to check out Rusty racing around the yard!